Corriendo es Spiritu

After finishing the 30km Merapoh Forest Run 2015 for Male Open Category.

I started running 3 year ago (almost), and I never really stop since then.
I remember my first run -  on the road heading to the Great Eastern Mall from my house. I never got comfortable running in a park or on a treadmill in a gym - mainly because of there are too much people and activities flocking into those places. Other than photography and writing (and annoy my girlfriend), I do not have other hobbies back then. In the spirit of trying new things, I decided to run. Putting on my training shoes, walk to the front gate, and off I go, heading towards Ampang through Jalan Ampang, from Jelatek. I do not do much research on how to run the right way, so the moment my feet hit the tarmac, pain strikes right to my legs, knees, hip and eventually causing exhaustion to my body.  But there was a strange feeling that I felt, the feeling that made me want to run again. The feeling as if your body are communicating with you and the constant battle that you feel between your mind and your body. I ran 1.5km that day before i hit the wall.

Running was part of my life since then. I continue running and try my best to run faster and longer. My running passion has evolved when I started to hike on mountains and hills.

"The Mountains are calling and I must go."  One of the reasons why I wake up so early in the morning on weekends and holidays - to run on a hill or a mountain. Why embrace the pain when you can just stay at home, or just chill in a mall or coffee shops? The answer is easy - to feel and remind myself to be human again.

3 years ago, my weight was 79 kilograms. After 3 years of running, hiking, climbing and all sorts of outdoor activities and adventures, I stand on the ground with a weight of 65 kilograms. Never in my life I have inflicted pain (indirectly) to myself to discover the limit of my body.

One thing for sure Insyaallah, I will continue running and embrace adventures. To feel human, in this disastrous 'civilized' world.

In the past 3 years, I have changed, or more like evolved, into this.

Next post will be the running story.

4 life changing moments for me:

1. You
2. Running
3. Hiking
4. Climbing

Embracing adventures (including moment number 1) changed my life forever.

Nature is amazing, our body is amazing, love...is amazing. That's what I've learned from all those 4 moments.

Travel more. Embrace Adventures.

Puisi Kasar untuk Pemimpin Kasar.

Kau perbodohkan rakyat,
Dengan kebodohan sendiri,
Tunggu sampai kau jadi mayat,
Tengok mana kau nak lari.

Bila kau ingat kau raja,
Kau lupa atas kau tuhan,
Kau berlagak bersahaja,
Tapi tidur kau keresahan.

Jika semua runtuh,
Kau tunggu kami cari,
Walau daun hijau sudah luruh,
Kau kami gantung sampai mati.

Aku angkat jasad kerasmu,
Pelukmu erat dalam dakapanku,
Mata hitammu merenung aku,
Air mataku jatuh ke badanmu.

Kecewa kerana tidak bersamamu,
Ketika kau dalam diam menahan sakit,
Ketika aku tidak mampu melihat,
Saat mengharap kau berlari ke arahku.

Habis hatiku luluh,
Pelukmu erat dalam tanganku,
Aku berjalan ke arah pohon buluh,
Dimana ke tanah aku lepaskanmu.

Dalam dakapan PencintaMu, sayang.
Lenalah kau dalam ciuman PencintaMu, sayang.
Bahagialah kau dalam pelukan Malaikat, sayang.
Kerana tangan aku tidak mampu lagi mengusapmu.

Fighting depression is harder than I thought it will be.
Surviving is a different story altogether.

Your head is spinning, your eyes are heavy.
Your body is standing there, but your mind are closing in.

And at the end of the day, your body feels like it just fell down from a mountain.

Satu Hayat Gunung

Epilog

Aku mencari cinta ketika manusia sibuk mengejar harta. Apabila manusia lebih takutkan hujan daripada syaitan dan nafsu. Bila segalanya memerlukan wang, antagonis gemuk bertopengkan pemimpin menyeret manusia ke lembah kehinaan. Lembah persembahan 'seni' hiburan. Apabila bergambar bersama bibir terjuih dianggap seni paling mantap. Apabila manusia sanggup berbogel demi nilai yang dicipta sendiri oleh manusia. Tersembunyi di sebalik nilai ajaib di dalam peti-peti mesin ATM.

Akulah manusia itu. Pagi aku keluar mencari duit, malam aku pulang menjadi hamba internet dan katil. Estasi rutin ini membuat aku resah gelisah sentiasa - mengharapkan segalanya akan jadi lebih baik apabila aku terus menerus jadi rajin untuk kepentingan orang lain. Dan ironinya, aku sedar aku menipu diri sendiri, dan tetap juga aku teruskan estasi melampau itu.

Sekarang aku berada di Puncak Gunung Datuk, Negeri Sembilan. Satu saat aku rasa macam raja segala raja. Pada satu ketika aku rasa macam......manusia.

Ini kisah aku sebagai manusia hamba pada hari-hari biasa, tapi manusia raja apabila aku menempuh perjalanan untuk memanjat....Gunung Everest.

"Kau ingat tak dulu bila kita start memanjat, jantung macam nak pecah! Nafas macam nak mati! Kaki.....aku tak rasa dah kaki aku masa tu."

Running the world.

As I sweat, I feel the cool breeze.
As my feets are losing control, I feel euphoric.

I can feel the pain, like stones crushing my shoulders.
Needles going through my bones.
Electricity flying into my heart.
Feel like stepping on shattered glasses.

But my mind is strong, pushing me to the limits.
Pushing me onto a world, where pains are just enemies.
Enemies that can be defeated, by determined minds.

As I run through these roads, these trails, I can feel it.
I am a King.

So, I'm joining the dark side of the force.

And hey, I'm loving it already.

At least this side gives me an opportunity to put my thinking cap on.

Now you can call me Darth Shuk-Ee-Sal.

"A dangerous path you have taken, young sith", "For I shall find you, and kill you.." whispered some of the Jedis out there.

Oh, here's a picture of the other Siths, my companions now:

May the Dark Side guide me always.

Running Spirit.

I can't run fast and long lately, sebab my knee macam sakit.
I can feel my knee screaming, beg me to stop running and go home to my bed sleep or something.

I just realised I'm addicted to this. This whole running spirit. I enjoyed the runner's high.
I realised running is my way to escape. A sense of escapism in life. So I changed my mind-set.
I don't run because I want to be free, to fly with the birds etcetera, etcetera,

But to live. To feel human.

So I left. I left the agency. I left the industry.

Off to another journey. May Allah bless this new adventure.

Bismillahirahmanirrahim.

I wrote a poem for the wonderful people at Lowe and Partners Advertising Agency. Below was what I scribbled in an email to everyone in the office:

"Hi,

I love writing in BM, so here’s a farewell poem for all of you wonderful people:

Lima candra bukannya lama,

Cukup tinggalkan kesan di hati,

Andai takdir untuk kita bersama,

Janji bertemu walau di pentas mimpi.

Eddy and Wan: I know, its lame. But it’s from my heart.

And I think that’s the most important thing to do in our life. To say it from our hearts.

With love,

Shukri Saleh / Little Shuk / Small Shuk / Shukri without the room"

Scrolling down my Facebook wall, my non-Muslim friends have conveyed their uneasiness on some of the things that we are not allowed to do as a Muslim. I understand that the Malay society has actually adopted the culture of 'hentam-menghentam' and 'menghukum' but now I notice something is terribly wrong:

Muslims are now being condemned and labelled because of the things that we should not do. We are being laughed because we defend our set of conducts, our way of life, our deen.

May Allah protect us all.

A new year, a new journey.

2014 meninggalkan kita.

It was a great year greatly accompanied by many devastating events for us Malaysians.

For me? It was as epic as it can get. Sent my first resignation letter for my first job in NagaDDB only to send another after 4 months of working at Lowe and Partner.

It the midst of finding light to my life - I decided to leave the advertising industry, forever if not only for a while. It was a great experience twas an exhausting one. 

2014 was the year I started to run seriously. Started to improve my speed and distance - preparing for the upcoming races. It was the year I started to take a good look at how I consume foods for a healthier life. It was a year of great outdoor adventures - hiking, trail running, rafting, jungle trekking.

Faced life with my love. We dah together for almost 3 years. And my love towards her has never been stronger.

Its the year my sister got pregnant. My first anak buah is now 2 months old! Alhamdulillah.

2015?

New career as a Marketer. Start saving more. Travel more. Learn more. Run more. Love more.

Bismillah.